So in honor of the upcoming Hallmark Holiday, I've decided to actually make a fun post so we can all get a good laugh at some of our schoolmates:

WHAT LAME PICK-UP LINES TO NEVER FALL FOR!

Ones that have been used on me:
-"Oh, your facebook photo is your tush, well it's a nice tush. Wanna grab a drink? *Squeezes tush*"
-"My bathroom is cleaner than dorm bathrooms. Wanna come back to my place?"
-"I hope I'm not as awkward as (insert his own fraternity president's name here). *leans in for a kiss*"
-"I just got Lasik. Am I hot or what?"
-"You're wearing Uggs? I am too. I'm wearing men's Uggs. Sexy, no?"
-"You watch TOP CHEF?! Me too! We have something in common!"

Ones you only hear when the person is kidding/reading it verbatim off of the internet:
-I lost my puppy. Will you help me look for him? I think he ran into a cheap motel room across the street.
-Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
-If I said you had a great body, would you hold it against me?
-Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?
-Are those space pants? Cuz your ass is out of this world!
-Nice Shoes. Wanna fuck?
-Screw me if I'm wrong, but haven't we met before?
-You have been very naughty! Go to my room!
-Let's do breakfast tomorrow. Should I call you or nudge you?
-If I were a fly, I'd be all over you, because you're the shit!
-Wow, you with those curves, and me with no brakes ...
-Girl, you must be tired 'cause you've been running through my mind all day!
-Hi, my name's {name}. Remember it, you'll be screaming it later tonight!
-My name is {name}, but you can call me anything at all. Just call me.
-If your left leg is Thanksgiving and your right leg is Christmas, can I visit you in between the holidays?
-Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell all my friends that we did anyway.
-I wish you were a screen door so I could slam you all day long.
-Did it hurt? (What?) When you fell from heaven ... Did it hurt?
-If you stood in front of a mirror and held up 11 roses, you
would see 12 of the most beautiful things in the world.
-If I could rewrite the alphabet, I would put U and I together.
-You make me so nervous and flustered, I've completely forgotten my standard pick-up line.
-Do you have a quarter? ... Sorry, my mom told me to call her when I meet the girl of my dreams.
-Baby, you're so sweet, you put Hershey's outta business.
-I know milk does a body good, but damn girl, how much have you been drinking?
-Are you a parking ticket? (What?)You got FINE written all over you.
-Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?
-Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes.
-Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see!
-Baby, I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your Bedrock!
-Did you clean your pants with Windex? I can practically see myself in them.
-Do you have a boyfriend? [No] Want one? [Yes] Well, when you want a MANfriend, come and talk to me.
Do you want to see something swell?
-Excuse me, but you have a beep on your nose. What? (Reach up and gently squeeze her nose) BEEP!
-Excuse me, I'm a little short on cash, would you mind if we shared a cab home together?
-Hey babe, wanna make an easy fifty bucks?
-Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.
-I am conducting a field test of how many woman have pierced nipples.
-I know I don't look like much now, but I'm drinking milk.
-I'd marry your cat just to get in the family.
-I've gotta thirst, baby, and you smell like my Gatorade.
-My friend and I have a bet that you won't take off your blouse in a public place.
-No, I'm not a cop. What can I get for fifty bucks?
-Pardon me miss, I seem to have lost my phone number, could I borrow yours?
-So, you're a girl huh?
-Stand back, I'm a doctor. You go get an ambulance, I'll loosen her clothes.
-Want to come see my HARD DRIVE? I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy.
-You know how they say skin is the largest organ? Not in my case.
-You make my software turn to hardware!
-You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear.

About the only internet pickup line I'd respond to with a giggle and an actual conversation:
-Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? (No.) Enough to break the ice. Hi my name's (_____)

This post was originally written by E3
University of Michigan · Undecided · 07 Feb 2007